Not My Rabbit

More 'Nuff

2011-05-01T19:56:00.002-05:00

'Nuff Said

2011-05-01T19:48:00.000-05:00

Easter & Stuff

2011-04-27T19:24:00.002-05:00

Molly's Whiskers

Death

Life

A Favorite Porch

Good Night To A Favorite Porch

Christmas and Beyond

2011-01-12T18:21:00.002-06:00

As usual, we started holiday celebrations at Crab's parents on Christmas Eve. It was low key compared to years past. In fact, it was a little strange in comparison. His folks are starting to slip and the lack of traditional crap which used to bug us bugged us because it was not there.

In their golden years they have discovered the joys of the company of cats, not that this detracted from the holiday. In fact the cats are a nice diversion and give one a topic of conversation other than "I told you that twelve times already" or "your house smells like a sewer".

The young addition to their family was cowering in the basement, poor thing. She was frightened by the sudden influx of humans. But the king of the house reigned.

Hawkeye

Icicles

Uncle Nutso and Jelly Bean

Cards have always been played at every get-together at Crab's parent's house. Crab's parents have approximately 389 decks of cards, some of which have been combined for Spite and Malice. After opening gifts, eating dinner and washing dishes H and I settled down to a game of four point pitch with her grandparents. I selected a deck which had a note attached that said it was for a 5 person game of pitch. We pulled out all the cards from 3-6 and started playing.

H & her grandpa won the first game. H and I were rolling our eyes when her grandma claimed to have played the 10 of diamonds earlier when it was crystal clear I had played it on the last hand. The second game ended with H and I aching with laughter. She snorted. I nearly pissed my pants. This happened on the same play:

Must have had one up my sleeve

Did I mention they were slipping?

The next day we opened presents here before heading to my folks. There's not much expectation there. There are no traditions except for the excellent food. Oh, and the fact that it becomes an official holiday when someone whips out a gun. Then others run to their trucks and get out their guns. Let the pissing match begin! It's better when it's warmer and the guns tend to be farther away from the house.

This year only one brother produced a gun. My niece showed off her skills.

Sharp and shooting

Only hitting beer cans!

H's boyfriend shot a gun for the first time ever.

Better here than in St. Paul!

I am jealous of the birds that flock to my parent's feeders. I rarely see a cardinal here but they are so ho-hum at my folks.

Cardinal? Again? Yawn.

Christmas night we chilled at home and played Yahtzee.

Molly helping Crab score in Yahtzee

I was not feeling well over the holidays. One day around New Year's I spent the whole day in my jammies. When I finally felt semi-human I went out into a blue and frosty day.

Blue

Frost

Nest

Cold road

Holidays are over and I am glad for that. Now if i could only get rid of whatever it is that has been hanging on to my throat since before Christmas. New year, new hopes and today -- a new bird. One I have never seen hanging around at my folk's place.

Owl

Deflated

2011-01-04T19:52:00.001-06:00

The holidays are over and I am grateful for that. I was ill and am still not feeling my best. On the first day I felt like moving I took a short walk and snapped this picture that describes my mood perfectly.

Deflated

Bermuda Triangle

2010-11-10T18:53:00.002-06:00

Weird things have happened out here in BFE. You would think we'd be insulated from craziness but we're not. We attract it.

1. Once a runaway from a troubled girls home ended up at our house having an asthma attack. She walked 10 miles on the tracks, passing countless farms and chose this place to be the one she got hauled away from by the authorities.

2. One chilly October morning a man knocked on my door at 6 a.m. He'd been at the bar in K Town the night before and took his tried and true gravel route to M town and ended up in the ditch. He was considerate enough to sleep in his car and wait until morning to knock at my door. He was no where near the gravel road route to M town.

3. One evening a crazed, drunken man knocked at my door needing me to call his wife to come and get him with the horse trailer. And a winch, I guess. He had been riding along the dredge ditch and his horse had gotten mired in the mud.

4.The topper (the tip of the triangle,if you will) has to be the guys who took a left turn onto the railroad tracks near our place, hanging up their car. The sheriff's office was called, the deputy arrived and Crab and Deputy Bill worked at pulling the drunken idiots out of the car AS A TRAIN WAS BARRELING TOWARDS THEM. I stood in the road with baby H in my arms watching the train smash the old Chevy down the tracks and wondered if Crab, Bill & the drunks survived. (They did.)

I don't miss the errant drunks and runaways but it's hard to keep the Bermuda Triangle feeling going if nothing weird happens. Now I have to settle for the 2 roosters that showed up a couple of months ago. No hens, just roosters.

Tonight I went for a short walk. The weather was turning and there was a near triangle experience.

Sun on K Town

November Surprise

Weather

Nest

Retrospect

2010-10-26T20:00:00.002-05:00

It seemed serendipitous to find a Facebook friend with twenty five pounds of tomatoes she did not want. I didn't can anything this year and I jumped on those tomatoes so fast the other FB friends were eating dust.

I am still in the middle of a canning mess. The sad part is these aren't real tomatoes, they are greenhouse grown and devoid of tomato aroma, texture and flavor.

I think my day would have been better spent on plan A, which was defrosting the deep freezer.

Labor Pains

2010-10-17T17:44:00.002-05:00

My camera worked on Labor Day. I got some nice pictures. The next time I picked it up everything I snapped looked like this:

Nice lines and color!

That's Molly, the little firecracker I rescued from a stupid, stupid woman who was giving all of her flea-bitten, wormy cats and kittens to the shelter if no one took them. My neighbor took 2 kittens, too, so Molly has siblings just down the road.

I guess I don't have much room to talk, stupid wise. I was on duty when Hey Bob escaped. I still dream about her and want her back even though that would exceed my 2 cat limit.

It has taken Skittles a little longer to warm up to Molly than it did Hey Bob. Maybe because Molly is such a fearless feline. She does not know when to quit and gets in moods where she decides the dog's tail is the ONLY toy worth playing with even though the dog snaps at her.

RAWR! I hate that kitten!

Oh, yeah. I got a new camera, too. I am still trying to figure out its nuances and I wish I were as steady as a tripod but it's a big improvement over lined, magenta tinged images.

Cat fight!

Testing the zoom on my lens. I took these from the same spot.

Wide angle

At the end of the optical zoom

Digital zoom

Testing the macro:

Pansy

Jetsam and flotsam from this morning's walk:

Change In The Weather

2010-09-14T18:48:00.002-05:00

The weather is out of the sticky hot summer mode and into the glorious fall mode. The cats have noticed. Last Monday I would have banged their heads together if I would have been able to catch them. They ran and chased each other from room to room and up and down the stairs.

Hey Bob escaped last Tuesday morning and eluded me all day. I finally got her in the house before Crab came home in the evening. She got a stern talking to and responded by settling into my lap and purring.

The next day things were pretty quiet. Snotty Pants is getting fat and lazy and Hey Bob was still recovering from Tuesday's romp. Before I went to bed I put the dog out to do her business. The cats ran to the porch. When I opened the door to let the antique dog in both cats bolted for the lawn. No biggie. It's happened before. Besides, I get up to pee at least once in the night. And Hey Bob is newly spayed so at least she wouldn't come back pregnant.

When I woke up at 2:30 I went out with a flashlight. Snotty Pants raced for the safety of the porch. Hey Bob danced in the light and completely dodged me. Fine, I thought, she will be more than ready for a warm, dry house when I wake up.

I haven't seen her since.

Chit Chat

2010-08-28T21:07:00.002-05:00

To those of you who know me, even if just in cyberspace, you know that Thursday night was my first night of the league bowling season. I was less than excited to start a winter sport during the height of summer and kind of hoped that my team had had a private meeting and kicked this old broad out. No such luck.

I went. I bowled. I kept score. I sat and waited my turn. And when I wasn't keeping score, bowling or waiting I kept my eye on team mate Chit Chat, who was boring holes in the brain of our potential new sub with a constant stream of mindless blather.

I watched the bowlers in the rotation and evilly eye-balled Chit Chat when it was her turn to bowl. Often it was necessary to shout "CHIT CHAT -- LANE WHATEVER!" The rest of us agreed that we were happy that it was not our brains that being drained of vital fluid.

One of my team mates brought up a good point -- that it was a "talent" to be able to ALWAYS have something to say.

Team mate said she was in situations all the time when she never knew what to say. I had to agree. That is me all the time. I've seen Chit Chat accost people who barely knew her and engage them in long conversations. Such a talent would never keep me from funerals (well, except for the churchy part) or wedding receptions where the only person I knew was the groom's mother.

When bowling was over Chit Chat commandeered a conversation from another bowler about the attempted suicide of her sister and turned the light on herself. Isn't it also a talent to know when to shut the fuck up? When to listen? When to put the keys in the ignition and drive away?

Since I could not afford the loss of more brain matter, I got in my car and drove away.

Anti-Social

2010-08-28T20:17:00.003-05:00

I sloughed off yet another funeral today. Sorry. I don't do church well. Tonight I am avoiding a wedding reception after avoiding the wedding this afternoon. I would feel bad about that if the bride or groom could pick me out of a line-up, but neither could. The mother of the groom (who is responsible for me getting an invitation) could but I'm hoping she is sufficiently soused and will not remember if I attended or not.

My neighbor called a while ago to invite me over for a few brewskis. Her husband is gone. Crab is gone. It is a beautiful night to sit in the yard and gab. I could go for a one-on-one gab session with an old friend but she said one of her sisters was coming over. If there's one sister, there's three and that's three too many.

It is Saturday night. If I had my druthers, I'd be out with the 30 something bachelorette party that I wasn't invited to. It's just as well as it is nearly past my bed time as I write.

So -- blah.

August 7, 2010

2010-08-12T18:20:00.002-05:00

Bright

Heart of the matter

Droplets

More Droplets

The day went down the toilet after this.

Coupon Lady

2010-08-04T19:58:00.002-05:00

I got stuck in line behind the coupon lady from hell today. I was so intent on getting my mission accomplished that I didn't realize it until it was too late.

I pushed my cart into an aisle of the grocery store that did not have the "open' light on. I looked at the checker dude and asked if he was still open and he assured me he was. I didn't realize at the time that he was so distracted/busy with coupon lady that he couldn't take the time to flip a switch.

I got up there and since the woman was already firmly ensconced at the station where one divvies up cash/charge/debit I didn't look. I assumed I was close to getting my stuff scanned and paid for. Boy, was I wrong.

I put up my reusable grocery totes and then started throwing my heavy crap on the conveyor belt. Checker Dude looked at me and told me Coupon Lady wasn't done unloading her cart.

THEN I looked. THEN I realized her cart was half full. She hadn't been paying -- she was leafing through the store ad and shuffling through approximately 1,279 coupons that she had in an envelope. And she was contesting every charge that came up on the screen by going through the ads and her coupons -- which weren't well organized.

To help I started taking things out of her cart and placing them on the belt. But there was more!! She had shit on the shelf below the main basket. Holy crap! When her merchandise actually moved along, I saw the bag of grapes was open and the movement caused one to fall on the floor between our carts.

Checker Dude was flustered, but kept his composure. He complied with every request she made to check the ad, the coupon, whatever. Even when things had already been scanned, couponed and checked she called him on some two cents she was due. Checker Dude had Bagger Boy find and remove contested item. Sometimes he had to call corporate for a judgment call, I swear.

To pass the time I looked at magazines. I didn't know who any of the people on the covers were, big surprise. Bigger surprise -- I looked at magazines and did not cold cock this penny pinching hag. Biggest surprise -- it amused me to watch Checker Dude being pushed to the limit and not cracking. Kind of reminds me of my waitress days when patrons did not die of their obnoxiousness and left a tip besides.

Coupon Lady finally gave up on her penny pinching because her ice cream was melting. Then she pulled out two 100 dollar bills to pay for her purchases. Checker Dude nearly cracked since he did not have much for change. Coupon Lady settled for 5's and 1's ("How many ones??") I guess her melting ice cream took precedence since she accepted them.

Coupon Lady apologized to me for the delay. I told her I would remember her and never get behind her again. When she was gone I told Checker Dude he was a prince, which he was. He reminded me of the store motto "a friendly smile in every aisle".

As I was leaving I told Bagger Boy and Checker Dude that Coupon Lady lost a grape and would be back for it. I could hear their sphincters snap.

The End Of July

2010-08-01T20:02:00.002-05:00

I managed to get some decent shots of one of my favorite insects. I can't get enough of nature's little helicopter.

Blue sky / dragon fly

Hairy belly -- who knew? (Besides Crab)

My friend, Hulles, is back in Iowa caring for his ailing mother. We got together Friday night. On my way out of the house Crab called to me, "Have fun on your date!" And I did.

Date night with Hulles

Crab mowed on Saturday while I was upstairs digging dust bunnies out. Warning to my future guests -- I'm sure I did not get them all. Please do not look for them. When I came down and sat at my desk I saw this stuck in the window.

Mowing day surprise

WTF

2010-07-28T20:04:00.002-05:00

I consider myself somewhat computer savvy. You may not think it to look at me, but I am not a total idiot. Not constantly, anyway.

Tonight Captain Crab sent me a YouTube link that I cannot open to save my life. YouTube wants me to prove something, though I'm not sure what. My age?? How bad can a video about a Winnebago be??

Google and YT must be in cahoots now, yet YT does not know me. I know I have a YT account, I know I have a Google account and yet the twain are not meeting. I tried several times to get in, to have YT tell my Gmail WTF I was doing wrong, all to no avail.

And the captcha, there to confound non-humans, has totally confounded me. Here are the last 5 of the approximately 1,239 attempts I made to access one stupid video.

I give up.

Office Kitties

2010-07-17T09:26:00.002-05:00

Hey Bob's gender became obvious a few weeks ago. Since I did not get HER into the vet for an operation I can expect another display of cat misery soon. When she is her normal self, she likes to help out in my office.

Office Kitty Is Too Big

Snotty Pants likes to help, too.

Snotty Pants Paper Weight

Storms

2010-07-17T09:16:00.002-05:00

Wednesday was a hot, hot day with a "heat index" of 114. The humidity was brutal. A cold front moved through and the ensuing storms moved around me, barely getting me wet. But they did leave a rainbow.

Rainbow

It's there, take my word for it. To the West the sky was brightening.

to the West

Somewhere last night got pounded by rain and wind. I swatted mosquitoes and photo stitched. No sewing required.

Panorama

I Need Crab

2010-07-07T21:02:00.002-05:00

I need him to take the pressure off full-blown adolescent kitty activities. When he's home, he complains about Hey Bob and I laugh. Crab left yesterday morning and Hey Bob is taking her teenage angst out on me.

This morning I woke to a newspaper knocked off the table and partially shredded on the floor. Ha ha. I sat at the computer and all of a sudden had no connection. I discovered Hey Bob had turned off the power strip that the router is plugged in to. Ha ha again.

I went to town today and purchased a much coveted item -- hydrocortisone cream -- to alleviate the itching from the boil like mosquito bites I am suffering from. I removed the tube from the cardboard box and, like a fool, left it on the table.

I found the tube later on the floor of the kitchen, the top flipped open and with tiny tooth perforations on the tube. Less funny.

Like a total idiot, I put the tube back on the table. This evening I went to a meeting and came home and could not find my hydrocortisone. So. Not. Funny.

I can't wait for Crab be the object of Hey Bob's torment. Call me. I wake up at 3 a.m. when the itching gets to me.

Rejection

2010-06-03T18:54:00.003-05:00

I cleaned out some file cabinets this afternoon. One folder contained rejection letters for various jobs I'd applied for in the early to mid 90's. I have no idea why I wanted kept them. To tell you the truth, I only remember applying for one of the jobs.

It was a memorable application and interview. The owner/HR director/smooth operator was favorably impressed because of many the resumes he'd received in the mail, mine was the only one mailed flat in a large envelope.

I was unfavorably impressed by the fact that the operational headquarters was in the basement of his house and involved typing up invoices and mailing them out. HELLO -- it was 19 frigging 95 and I did not type any more, I word processed on a computer and printed on an ultra modern dot matrix printer. Upstairs. With daylight streaming in.

I was not disappointed to be rejected for the job. I would have been laughing hysterically when the owner/HR director/smooth operator got convicted for various felonious activities regarding his so called business had he not taken huge amounts of money from sweet people from his church.

I really, really reject that.

Bob's Back

2010-05-27T20:19:00.002-05:00

Hey Bob is home, as in "in the house". Snotty Pants is outside again, on the concrete stoop that faces west, rolling in the rays of sunset.

Did I tell you that it was a BEAUTIFUL DAY?? I want to live in a place where the weather is like this all of the time. My BFF tells me that place is San Diego.

Now an update on my update: All creatures great, small, old and fat, are in the house. Now if only someone would cook supper for this great, old, fat creature.

Bad Parenting / Snatched From the Jaws of Death

2010-05-27T19:45:00.003-05:00

A week ago tonight, Captain Crab let Hey Bob and Skittles (aka Snotty Pants) out to frolic in the yard. Snotty Pants came back in and Hey Bob did not. I went to bed with SP and after we were settled, Crab came and took SP to send her outside to bring Bob back in. It did not work.

I woke up at 2:30, had to pee and, what the heck, look for cats. I went outside in my underwear and over sized "Howard Dean Precinct Captain" T shirt to look for them. SP came right away and I put her in the house before wandering around barefooted on grass and gravel with a flashlight.

I saw the reflection of animal eyes on the road. I hoped it was Hey Bob and not a possum or coon because I was NOT in the mood to go back for the .22. I approached the animal and it was ..... a large, strange cat. I was dumbfounded since it has been a while since ~~I've randomly fed anything that moves~~ I've seen a stray cat on the property.

I circled it and it ran into the yard towards the house. I walked to the the front porch and saw reflected eyes again. It was Hey Bob! Home from his adventure! Unscathed by the rabid, blood thirsty tiger that was prowling!

The next morning Captain Crab was relieved of his duties of indulging Hey Bob's wanderlust whims. And he was very, very good. Crab, I mean. He took Bob out only while holding him. Which is kind of cruel.

It was a glorious day today. Weather we deserve! Windows open! Birds singing! Cats going bonkers! I let them out. They frolicked under the beautiful, fragile willows and long grass. It was easy to get Snotty Pants back to the house.

The Willows

Jail Break

Taste of Freedom

And …. Gone…

I will get him back. He's been snatched from the jaws of death before.

Good Grief

2010-05-07T20:18:00.002-05:00

To all the citizens worrying about the resources getting sucked away by illegal immigrants: look in your own neighborhood.

I have witnessed, over and over, young women (white citizens) taking advantage of government programs and complaining about them!! And it's pissing me off.

What's pissing me off even more is someone (The Incredible Mind Suck) now gloating that a state program HAS to pay $150 a month for a year PLUS the normal food package for her 2nd (out of 3 illegitimate kids) to get proper nutrition.

TIMS is someone who used college loan money to buy herself a red sofa and a video camera when she only had one child. Because you never know when free money is going to land in your lap again.

Unless you keep having babies.

It's About Time

2010-04-28T19:19:00.002-05:00

It's about time. Time that has passed. Time in which I haven't posted. So now I am playing catch up. Maybe the title should have been Heinz.

Get it? Catch up? Ketchup? I think I am channeling Hulles, whose warped sense of humor can take a metaphor and wring it like a farm wife on the first step of preparing a chicken dinner. Let's get back on track now...

On March 18 we still had tons of snow to melt.

The Snow on March 18

Goblinbox was posting pictures of flowers in bloom in Walla Walla, Washington while we were waiting for the other shoe (blizzard) to fall. As late as April 4th (Easter), there was still snow lingering in ditches, fencerows and groves. H, coming home from what we presume to be the frozen tundra of Minnesota could not believe how much snow was in Iowa.

Oh, Spring! I welcomed it with open arms. Winter was brutal. We lived buried in snow for months on end. But Spring is finally here! I love it and want to live with it forever!

Sweet, Sweet Baby Iris

In between the snow melt and spring's arrival I waited for action at the bird feeder. There was a very squirrelly squirrel. Do squirrels molt? This one did. Crab thought I was seeing things but here's the evidence.

Molting Rodent

On the cat front: Skittles loves to sit in my lap and chew on stuff I'm wearing. Her favorite is my gold necklace (a gift from Crab for my 40th birthday). Sometimes, though, the necklace is hidden under layers of clothing. If Skittles is lucky, I will wear something with buttons. She tries her best to chew the buttons off my clothing. I find this very strange.

Button Eater

Last Saturday I went to a baby shower. I hate baby showers, wedding showers and all showers that do not require you to get wet, lather and rinse. I went and survived all the sugar that was fed to the guests. I am surprised the guests who ate from the sugar buffet did not bounce off the walls and punch holes in them. I went because I just had to see for myself it the honored infant was as cute in real life. He was.

Cute Baby

And now, just for K8, updates on Hey Bob:

He can be a total terror
He can be very sweet
He is probably a she
It will still be Hey Bob regardless of its (future neutered) gender

Hey Bob

Your Eyes Would Bleed

2010-04-21T19:21:00.002-05:00

--if I had posted my thoughts since I last time I ventured into the blogosphere. I considered turning on the recorder on my MP3 player and capturing ramblings for posting. But I haven't. And you're welcome.

Upcoming posts will be about:

Thank God Spring is here, complete with photos
Hey Bob is growing up, but also getting annoying
If you smoke, DO NOT GET THE PRESCRIPTION FOR CHANTIX if you want to quit
Forming vigilante forces for lynching physicians who prescribe Chantix
And my favorite: Economics don't trickle down, but crazy sure does

March

2010-03-03T18:38:00.003-06:00

March came in like a lamb. Like a little bunny gently hopping -- over the giant drifts and shoveled piles of snow that look like they will never melt. The snow on Columbus Day, so long ago, was a portent of the endless crap to follow. It has been a long winter.

January was an endless stream of snowstorms, sub-zero temperatures, ice storms and funerals. Friends and relatives died one after the other. Then I had poor, old, sick Mouse (the cat) put to sleep.

Mouse's funeral is pending. If I die in the winter you can put my funeral on hold, too. And like I told H while sitting next to her at Lutheran funerals, if organ music is played and you force the handful of "mourners" (celebrants?) to sing (mumble/mouth) hymns I will haunt you forever.

My computer died, too. It succumbed to the viruses and trojans that had plagued it for months and were exacerbated by the ministrations of "Secure IT". I have been back-peddling trying to get stuff back to normal in computerland and it is a bumpy road.

A bright spot, or maybe it's a stupid spot, is the new addition to the family. I was making an effort to stay away from the Humane Society after losing Mouse and then...a friend had seen a kitten in the parking lot at work. When she got home heard mewing. She found the kitten under her hood. I went to just look at him and that is how Hey Bob came to live with us. Hey Bob does not give me the time of day. He is Crab's cat through and through.

News Flash

2010-02-07T07:46:00.003-06:00

We are under a winter storm watch. I've lost count the watches, warnings, days of blizzard conditions, snowfall totals, how many times we've had freezing rain and the number of days school has been canceled. I think last week was the first full week of school since some time in November. They had an early dismissal on Friday, though, because it was snowing.

At least there are breaks between bouts of weather we do not want, giving one a chance to run to town for milk and cat food. When thousands sat in the dark for days we lost our electricity only for a few minutes. I am most grateful for having electricity when the weather is so bad. This is me, counting my blessings.

A few weeks ago the road grader got a little too close to the ditch. It's understandable since it is really hard to tell what is ditch and what is road.

Stuck

This is how a road grader gets unstuck.

How to Get Unstuck

Sorry, it was a cold day and I took pictures from inside the house. I didn't want to alienate the county workers by photographing from the road or the yard. I'm sure gawking and photographing them from my window did not bother them at all.

Winter has been tough on everyone. Here's a squirrel eating peanut butter and cornmeal out of a feeder I made for woodpeckers.

Rascal

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Yesterday was a nice day. It was warm by winter standards and very still. I tried going for a walk down the back lane but gave up. I needed snowshoes. So I took a stroll down the road.

The Lane

RR Xing

Tracks to Whiteness

Building

Building Blocks

Doorways

It's snowing now. If the thought of what's to follow weren't so darn depressing it would be a very pretty snowfall.

It Just Gets Better And Better

2010-01-07T16:26:00.004-06:00

Yesterday the light, fluffy snow fell and fell. My car looked like this:

Today that fluffy snow is flying about with wild abandon. It is not very pleasant. My dog (the only one who has actually been outside today) has to step into the unknown, since we can't see the step.

I cleaned that off yesterday!

Out the kitchen window:

Captain Crab is losing his truck:

And I am hoping to hear that Hannita decided NOT to make a road trip from Chicago to Iowa today.

Changes

2010-01-06T19:25:00.002-06:00

I'm listening to "The Human Spark" on PBS right now. Alan Alda is exploring primitive man. He keeps saying "Neandertal". I studied this stuff years and years ago in grade or high school, and back in those neolithic times, we called early man "Neanderthal". Every time Alan says "Neandertal", I get a tic.

Maybe he's right. I don't know. I do remember suffering great confusion when out of the blue the capital of China quit being Peking and started being Beijing. I'm guessing the people of China got ticked that the Westerners started calling Beijing something else because it was easier for them.

But I really, really doubt that there's a coalition of pissed off Neanderthals demanding political correctness.

Or everything I ever learned in school was wrong, wrong, wrong.

Santa's Last Legs

2009-12-30T20:04:00.002-06:00

Every year my mother in law gives me (us) a Santa. This year through stupid luck I ended up not with the Santa that was handed me, but with a Santa I really liked. This morning I woke up and found his feet. After looking around, I found the rest of him.

Double Amputee

Although it may look simple to glue him back together, it is not. I have devised a repair plan and by the time I am done implementing it, I will have invested enough time and materials to make it one very expensive Santa.

And how did Santa end up dismembered? I wasn't a witness but my number one suspect is the plant killing Skittles.

My Yoville House

2009-12-22T17:55:00.003-06:00

Welcome to my cozy Yoville house! When you first walk in the door you are right smack dab in my living room. It is decorated for the holidays. I don't have a real tree because I'm cheap and haven't worked in a long time.

Living Room

When I visited Yoville to take these pictures, my parrot, Polly, had X's for eyes. Evidently I needed to feed her. She's fine now.

The door behind me on the right leads to my kitchen.

Kitchen

Another door leads into my bedroom. Be quiet! I am taking a nap!

Bedroom

My bathroom is off my bedroom. I love how they pixelated my lower half when I sat on the pot. This is the first time I sat on my Yoville pot. It's a wonder I'm still alive!

Don't Look!

Look at my bedroom again. See that book case? It is really a secret door that leads to my library. The room is a reward I won for doing Yovillian things.

My Secret Library

Back through the secret bookcase door, through the bedroom, back to the living room and into the hallway.

Hall

The room off the hallway was another reward for doing Yovillian things. It is supposed to be a bathroom but since I had so much furniture and way too many fireplaces, I turned it into a sitting room.

Sitting Room

Ahh.... I love my Yoville house. Actually, it's an apartment. Houses cost REAL MONEY. Forget that noise. One of my FB & Yoville friends has a modern beach house with every one of the many rooms stuffed to the gills with expensive furniture. I'm thinking she is giving virtual blow jobs to live like that.

Not me! I don't even go to work anymore since they turned the furniture factory into a bakery. I have to pay to buy ingredients and mix them up and stick them in the oven. If I don't visit Yoville in a timely manner, my baked goods burn and I am screwed. Plus I have to PAY to CLEAN THE FRIGGIN OVENS whether I burn something or not.

I get enough of that in real life, thank you very much. They had better start making virtual life fun. I guess I can always visit my apartment and hide out in my secret library.

Catching Up

2009-12-21T18:50:00.003-06:00

I have been lax in posting. Here is a short version of the last few months.

October

It sucked. It was cold and wet. On Columbus Day we had this:

Happy Columbus Day

October continued its cold wetness and brought us to --

November

November was warm, dry and sunny. Farmers finished what they couldn't do in October. Plants were confused.

Bloom in November

We survived stuffing ourselves on Thanksgiving and the next night was the party H had planned and for which I was struggling to finish altering the vintage dress.

Vintage Dress

That photo does not do the dress justice. It looked fabulous hung on the frame of lovely H. I did not get any pictures of H in her great aunt's dress. We got to the party, she was busy, the food got laid out, we ate and then ...

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ -

Let's just say Crab and I missed the rest of the party, the cake, and the photo ops. Crab is still alive, none the worse for the wear.

November also brought many frustrations (see previous posts). Through the help of my personal hero, I finally came through those. It was a long, tough haul for someone not as bright as the most awesome guru of geekness. The trojan is vanquished! The queen reigns! I so ♥ you Mush!

My Hero

My hero will get a present in the mail as soon as I get around to it, which may not be real soon because now we are in

December

December has brought us snow, blizzards, fog, arctic temps and crap since it began. My mother called today to tell me Christmas at her house is CANCELED. H told me that, barring a Christmas miracle, she is not going to make the journey down. I am sad that my H won't be here, yet grateful she will not be on the interstate with the idiots.

Next year: Nothing but greatness! After the spring thaw, that is.

Every Thing I Touch

2009-12-05T19:54:00.002-06:00

Every thing turns to S&%# pretty fast. Just a warning. Do not come near me and get the S&%# cooties!!

I'm trying, I really am. But it's a baby step forward and two giant steps back.

On the other hand, I am reading (mostly when I wake up in the middle of the night and cannot get back to sleep) Barbara Kingsolver's latest novel and am loving it to death. I want to swim in her brain until I drown. I want to own this book so I can highlight it, underline passages and write in the margins.

But mostly I want to sleep straight through for at least 7 hours. And own this novel. And The Poisonwood Bible. Best. Book. Ever. But then, I'm not finished with The Lacuna.

Trouble

2009-11-17T19:11:00.002-06:00

This is probably the least troubling thing that happened to me today.

Add to that the fact I cut my finger picking up pottery shards and it is still the least troubling thing that happened today. So Snotty Pants dodged a bullet of retribution there.

Needle In A Haystack

2009-11-11T16:17:00.002-06:00

All that glitters is not gold, I discovered as the teeny tiny screw from the bobbin casing fell with an audible plink onto my sewing room floor. Glittery things included sewing pins, bent sewing machine needles and actual glitter off of fabric from an old project. Even dead asian lady beetle parts sparkle when you shine a flashlight on them.

The haystack consisted of piles of thread snippets, fabric scraps and long tails of fabric cut off by the serger.

See the screw? That tiny thing?

Teeny Tiny Screw

There It Is!

Two bright sides to this -- I found the screw and got the floor swept. Now to finish altering that vintage dress for H. She will look stunning.

KER-THUNK

2009-10-08T15:26:00.002-05:00

A couple of weeks ago on a lovely warm and sunny day, a bird flew into my clean kitchen window with a loud ker-thunk. I ran outside to tend to an injured bird or bury a dead one, but there was no bird to be found, just this print it left behind.

Bird Print

The sun is set on a beautiful day yesterday. It was a beautiful day because the sun was out, it didn't rain and the temps were above 65 degrees.

How quickly my idea of a beautiful day has changed. On September 27 the high was in the 80's, the sun was brilliant and a cold front was ready to descend on us. I took a drive and snapped some photos, wanting to keep warm and sunny September with me until spring.

Colorful Weirdness

Barn Quilt

Trail

Historical Marker

River

Fishing

Black Horses, Black Birds

My Favorite Dam

More Fishing

There is snow (snow I said!) in our forecast for this weekend. That makes me feel like the many coons I encountered on my sunny day road trip.

Ker-thunk, Ker-thunk

Bye, Bye Summer

2009-09-26T19:34:00.005-05:00

Summer gave BFE the best weather ever. I can't remember the last time I turned on the air conditioner and I haven't been tempted to turn on the furnace. For a month or more it didn't rain, wasn't windy and the day temps were in the high 70's to low 80's with night temps in the area of 55. As far as I'm concerned, summer doesn't get any better.

My gourds agreed. They took over the trellis, the fence the trellis lays against, the bushes a ways down the fence and the fence that runs perpendicular to the trellis. The vines are loaded with birdhouse gourds. I'm so excited about the crop that I don't care that I only harvested one sick cucumber and the other variety of gourd that I thought I planted never appeared. Next year: birdhouses galore. Also next year: better gourd / cucumber planning and planting.

Loaded Trellis

I planted Mexican sunflowers again this year. The butterflies love them and this year the bumblebees have been thick.

Boo! Bee!

Pretty Butterfly -- Don't know what kind

~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ -

Before the season officially changed from Summer to Fall a friend and I went to Spencer to the Clay County Fair. Captain Crab worked that fair for years and every year little H and I would go up and stay in The Hotel, park on the fairgrounds, get into and hang out at the fair for free.

It has been years since Crab worked the fair and therefore years since I've been there. I was taken aback by the changes there. One thing that didn't change was my route and the views I so enjoy.

Heading in to Gillette Grove

The first thing that threw me was the Sky Glider. Just like at the state fair! We took that first so I could get my bearings -- things had changed that much.

View from the top

Some things you can always count on

More things you can count on -- though I saw cabbages almost as big as some of these pumpkins

I was surprised at the new buildings. They had a convention center which was filled with shills. I like fair shills as much as the next person, but we walked through every building and every building that didn't have animals or trains in it was full of or surrounded by vendors selling CRAP. Not that I wasn't tempted. I really, really want an infrared sauna.

Vince couldn't make it. Something to do with parole violations.

The old train building was replaced with this incredibly large structure crammed with an intricate tableau of railroading.

A whole lot of choo choo

There were cities, small towns, a replica of the fair itself, a circus, a replica of Arnold's Park (which has no meaning to anyone who hasn't been near the Iowa Great Lakes), areas of industry, milling, mining, farms, and fishermen in row boats, barges, changing seasons... Gee, I didn't realize I liked tiny stuff so much.

Fire department in a snow covered town

The weather was on the warm side. We walked, sought food, looked for a seat in the shade and started the process over again. We figured we spent 6 hours walking in the heat and dodging the same bitch with a stroller for most of those 6 hours. Hey lady! Get a clue! Your infant is not enjoying broiling at the fair!!

Then we headed home and went through a small town only slightly off the track. I'd never been through it before but it was worth it just for this:

The -- end?

Speechless - You Wish

2009-09-08T18:09:00.003-05:00

This little headline caught my attention:

Fines proposed for going without health insurance

Yes, by all means, require all Americans to feed the feed coffers of the insurance companies or suffer the consequences. Don't those idiots in Congress get it? SOME PEOPLE CANNOT AFFORD HEALTH INSURANCE. And any insurance they could buy would do them no good if they so much as stubbed a toe. (Bill: $500 they do not have against their $5000 deductible.)

While Congress is at it they might as well require everyone to buy a Ford and really help out the economy. Hey -- why not require everyone to shop at Walmart so the Wally World shareholders can keep raking in the dough while denying to insure most of their workers?

I may volunteer for the death panel. Please let my President lead.

Noblesse Oblige

2009-08-26T19:04:00.001-05:00

From Wikipedia: "In ethical discussion, it is sometimes used to summarize a moral economy wherein privilege must be balanced by duty towards those who lack such privilege or who cannot perform such duty."

In hearing and reading about the Kennedy clan I came to believe they were indoctrinated with "noblesse oblige" from birth, taught that their wealth was not ordained by God and they had obligations to the people who made that wealth happen and to the people who had no champions at all.

When reading of the escapades of a few of them I knew that at times some fell short:

"... it has been used recently primarily to refer to public responsibilities of the rich, famous and powerful, notably to provide good examples of behaviour or to exceed minimal standards of decency."

A few of them failed at times, including Ted Kennedy. But I think he worked like hell to overcome his failings and live up to the noblesse oblige legacy.

RIP, Teddy.

PS

2009-08-18T19:31:00.000-05:00

Don't even get me started on Walmart.

Save Big Money (and get pissed off)

2009-08-18T19:24:00.002-05:00

Yesterday in a fit of git-er-done, I went to Menards. I hate that place. Like Walmart, I knew I hated it when I went it. But there were some things I wanted NOW since I had started a project.

Had I been patient, I could have had boards custom cut at the nearby small town lumber yard, picked up paint at the hardware store in the same small town, and gotten other incidentals there that went with my project.

But I was in a big toot (I have a small window of time to complete the project AND clear a path for Captain Crab when he returns from where ever in hell he is) so I drove to Big Town, through frigging road construction, clear to the other side of town where the behemoth Menards resides.

I headed towards the paint looking for cheap-cheap-it-doesn't-matter-paint and the first thing I took notice of was SHOELACES!! Because everyone looking for lumber, paint and hardware needs shoelaces!!

I passed many items that, had I thought about it, I could have used at home. But I eschewed them all because I went there for paint, boards and some hardware.

After I completed filling my list I ended up in line behind a guy I know. He told me I did NOT want to be behind him in line because he was paying with a credit card and for some reason, credit transactions were painfully slow.

We chatted some about the store in the big town that Menards put out of business. It had a contractors area (where my friend would have gone) where things were expedited. It also did not have bird seed, picture frames, dog beds, coffee, soup, shoelaces, bleach, books or DVDs.

In spite of having more than six items (the limit), I went to the express lane. I'd forgotten how the check out process is so very, very whacked. You put your stuff on the conveyor, run to the other end, swipe your card, put in your numbers, bag your stuff, pull your receipt, pack your crap in a cart and haul it out. Now that's service!! I don't know that I would have been able to pay with cash or write a check.

I cannot express how much I despise Menards and regretted giving them money.

Stay Off My Road!

2009-08-12T18:34:00.004-05:00

What would you do if you were driving down the road and met a car in the other lane stopped half on the shoulder with a woman inside obviously screaming and alternately waving her arms, pointing at the road and pulling at her hair?

If you were the asshole in the white service truck, you would keep on going at a break-neck speed and aim for the kittens in the road.

I was on my way home from my weekly supply run to the big town, traveling down the county hardtop when I noticed tiny creatures trying to cross the road ahead. I slowed down and was dismayed to see that it was five kittens. My first thought was to gather them up and take them home. There's nothing I love more than a kitty! Five kitties = five times the fun!

I slowed way down and the kittens puddled in the middle of the road. I crept closer and they pooled on the pavement in the left lane. So I pulled up and off the road a little with the intention of getting out of the car and shooing the poor things completely off the road.

That's when I saw Major Asshole heading for them and went through the histrionics trying to get him to SEE THE KITTENS ON THE ROAD!! SEE--LADY IN DISTRESS--POINTING--AT THE KITTENS IN THE ROAD??!!

He clipped one -- the others mercifully ran back across my lane and into the ditch. In my rear view mirror then I saw mama kitty on the opposite shoulder and the clipped kitty trying lamely to reach her.

My next step was to put the car in park, gather the brood and reunite them all, hoping the clipped kitty only had superficial wounds. But the oncoming traffic kept coming and coming and coming. Each and every one of them on some ridiculous mission requiring no attention and tremendous velocity.

I went home in tears.

Stay off of my road, please.

Summer So Far

2009-07-23T08:12:00.002-05:00

Summer is whizzing by and leaving me in the dust. There will be no pictures of my flower gardens in this post because they are choked with weeds, as is my little sweet corn patch. The tomato patch is covered in landscape fabric to ward off weeds or I wouldn't be able to find it. There may or may not be tomatoes ripening on the vines.

In June I went to The Cities and got distracted on the way home and posted about it. The next weekend I took pictures for 3 days at town celebration for which I maintain a website. Then I spent days editing photos and the website.

Then came the 4th of July. Right after that I got thrown into the planning and preparation for our little K Town Celebration, which happens in NINE DAYS. Yikes! So much to do, so little time. Oh, and last Saturday Crab and I tended bar at a wedding. I had little sleep the 2 nights before (my list of things to do keeps me awake at night, doing NOTHING but fretting). Crab had spent the day before on his feet all day at a dog and pony show. I was led to believe that we would be relieved of our duties after the buffet was served. I was lied to. We ran our butts off for 10 hours and got home at 1 a.m. I am just now recovering from that.

I have taken a few pictures here and there. On July 6 I was marveling at the "snow" that covered the grass.

The cottonwoods were just busting out all over.

While I was playing with settings on my camera and watching it snow, the dog was busy inside. So I guess it was snowing inside, too.

A mega roll of Charmin

On July 13 I went to the neighbor's house to take care of some K Town celebration business and found this on the side of the road.

The silly bird was at least a half mile from water. As I got closer to him, he hopped into the ditch, so at least he was off the road. I like to think he was a juvenile who hadn't learned to fly yet and that eventually he hopped (or flew!) back home.

On Tuesday night there was yet another meeting for the celebration. It was held in the park until some of us had to pee at which point the meeting moved to the bar. It was a nice night so we sat outside. I noticed darkness in the north and decided I'd better head home to shut down this box which had been left running.

Storm brewing

I checked the radar and the cell was north of me. No big deal! Then I checked which way the storm was moving and shut down right away. It rained and hailed and the wind blew. I'd left a cooler by the front step on the east side of the house. After the storm I found it had rounded the corner of the house and had landed half way to the mailbox.

It was a beautiful day yesterday, right up until another little storm cell came in the evening.

Wednesday's storm

Gourd Blossom

No hail this time, but it sure did rain.

Rain

Coolest Wedding Thanks Ever

2009-07-11T17:31:00.002-05:00

Captain Crab and I crashed a wedding reception last month. We had tons of fun. The other day we got the coolest wedding thank you EVER. The names have been changed to protect the innocent and the guilty. The guilty being me and Crab, of course.

We go to weddings we are not invited to and don't send in the RSVPs for weddings we are invited to. The cards get shoved into the "do later" pile and then before I know it, the "respond by" date has passed.

I usually call and beg them to please, please not turn us away when we show up. IF we want to go to the wedding. There are the weddings we can't figure out why we were invited at all. Those RSVPs, well, um, let's just say we are dripping in social graces and we may be high on some people's shit list.

It's About Blooming Time

2009-07-04T19:42:00.002-05:00

Red Hollyhocks

Hollyhocks and Sunflower

Oxalis Vulcanicala "Molten Lava"

Yucca

Petunia

Linden Tree In Bloom

Bugs Loving the Linden Blooms

After looking at the pollen spilling from the hollyhocks, I'm glad I don't suffer from allergies. That hollyhock looks lethal.

I Hate The Interstate

2009-06-24T21:04:00.002-05:00

I hate the interstate so much that I wanted to take a slower way home from my trip to the cities. I was so relaxed on this road that I got slightly misplaced.

Petey Must Die

2009-06-14T09:52:00.002-05:00

The last time H was home she saw the ground squirrel cleaning up seed under the bird feeders. "Aw," she said, "I'm naming him Petey".

A few days later Crab and a neighbor were enjoying the time honored practice of sitting on the front stoop, drinking beer and trying to shoot ground squirrels. There was at least one rodent fatality that day. I secretly hoped it wasn't Petey.

Cute little Petey appeared the next day to stuff his face under the feeder and has been showing up daily. We co-exist. I don't bother him and he hasn't bothered me until this morning.....

Eating flowers!

Gardening Stuff & Bird Notes

2009-06-12T15:51:00.003-05:00

The cardinal pictured in the previous post did not hang around. I was lucky to get a picture. Why, oh, why do they always leave me? I have sunflower seeds! I have water!

The orioles are still here, at least. I had an plastic net onion sack filled with yarn bits hung in a tree. Last week I checked it and it was empty. The other day I tiptoed through the long grass and looked up in the trees until I saw the orioles high in the branches next to their nest. They are nesting here! Take that you stupid cardinals!

I have been trying to get my flower gardens in order. It's work. It's work I have to redo constantly since Gretchen thinks freshly dug flower beds mean a new dog wallow for her. She jumps in her swimming pool (small stock tank) then rolls and digs around in the dirt sending teeny, tiny petunias flying. I think that dog would live happily with pigs.

Besides the grave stone I made for Ringo, I have been making pavers for lawn edging. These are studded with glow in the dark stars that used to be stuck all over the daughter's ceiling.

In other news, yesterday I made a trellis for cucumbers and gourds.

I discovered that the dirt I made was not done cooking. The weed seeds sprouted like crazy as soon as I filled these "planters". Tomatoes sprouted, too. And even though I didn't plant any squash in there, I may have some squash growing. The thing is, I can't tell because the cucumbers and gourds look the same as squash. So we will see what I end up with. It could be a good year for things not planted.

Memorial For Ringo

2009-06-12T15:23:00.005-05:00

Ringo was my fuddy duddy little buddy. I adopted him from a friend who had adopted him from a shelter. I loved him long before he came to live with me. He was funny, smart and talented. In spite of his size, he was a wonderful watch dog. He was no match for the UPS driver, however.

Ringo has been gone for sometime. I buried him under the cedar trees by the bird feeders. I can see Ringo's grave when I look out the kitchen window so I think about my fuddy duddy little buddy every day.

Ringo's grave. The cardinal did not hang around.

I made a new stone for Ringo with his tag in the center of it. The other day I moved the rocks and placed the stone and planted some flowers. It is a more suitable memorial for a dog I loved so much.

R.I.P.

More Procrastination From Yesterday

2009-06-03T19:34:00.002-05:00

My goal yesterday was to get some house cleaning done while the Crab was on the road. So I guess the inbox cleaning was procrastination from that. Once all the cat videos had been watched, it was time to....

Think about the birds!

Every time I pass the kitchen window I have to look to see what is there. I wonder if I am doing my best to keep the birdies happy. In true procrastination form, yesterday afternoon I decided I was not.

Even though I have 3 jelly stations set up for the orioles, I decided they needed their nectar feeder. So I made nectar, filled the feeder and hung it. Then I started cleaning. Unfortunately I have to pass the kitchen window often. Less than an hour after I hung the feeder, I saw this:

Poor little thing

The poor little hummingbird could not get the hang of this feeder. He couldn't find the holes and the perches were set for the big birds. So he hummed around and was sipping drips that fell from the bottom.

I did what any compassionate procrastinator would do. I cleaned the old decrepit hummingbird feeder. I broke the plastic tip on the top trying to shove a wire into it and had to waste more time jerry rigging a new way to hang it (queen of time wasting!). I filled it, hung it and went back to cleaning. I was rewarded later by observing a happy hummingbird at that feeder.

In other news: The peach iris are blooming. And weeds are taking over everything.

Peach Iris

Danger Will Robinson!

2009-06-02T20:21:00.001-05:00

Something as innocuous as cleaning out the old mailbox can turn into a major time waster.

I had recently thoroughly scoured the inbox with a stiff brush and Clorox. And yet tonight I found the inbox. Full. Of. Shit.

Just to be on the safe side, I checked things out. Was there an address I needed? Had I responded to everyone who deserved a response? What link is this and why do I need to see it again and/ or save it?

Which is how I got sucked into YouTube and the Two Talking Cats. Since Mouse was asleep and oblivious, I drug Skittles off the porch, put her on my lap and cranked up the speakers.

Skittles lost interest early. Me, I kept searching for a video that would capture her attention, surfing cat videos -- and then re-watched cat yodeling. Thanks for that, Gwen. I really needed it.

Shoot me.

Dear Jerry

2009-05-22T17:31:00.001-05:00

Thank you for your rigs. Without them this house would have fallen in on itself long ago.

Love,
pj

Take The Long Way Home

2009-05-19T19:07:00.004-05:00

"Take The Long Way Home" is one of my favorite songs and taking the long way home is one of my favorite things to do. It turns out my morning mission to snag tomato plants from my mother involved the long way there, too, due to road construction.

Crab told me when I got the Subaru a couple of years ago to stay off gravel!!! That is really hard to do when we live on a gravel road. For the most part I try to comply. Sort of.

Today I had a golden pass when I encountered road construction on the way to my mom's to get tomato plants. Crab (driving man that he is) understands not waiting a half hour for a pilot vehicle to lead you down a road for two miles that you can easily do without.

So I bypassed the wait and the pilot car and encountered this along the Lizard Creek, on a road I've traveled many times before. Today it was especially beautiful.

Canada Geese!

There were swallows nesting under the bridge. They ripped through the sky like fireworks. My presence was not appreciated. I tried to photograph them but they moved too fast and my digital camera is a POS. There is one at the top of this frame that features happy cows.

Happy Cows

After I crossed the creek, I had to stop and take another gander. So lovely!

Looking back at the Lizard

I made it to my mom's and picked up my tomato plants. And some rosemary. And some parsley and thyme (no sage -- what's up with that??). Oh, and some salvia and petunias because her petunias rock and mine are still teeny, tiny tunias. And I was angry at myself because I went up for ten tomato plants, came home with more plus the herbs and flowers.

The plan was to bust ass to get home and plant the darn tomatoes but I decided to visit a greenhouse in a small town that my mother (who has her own greenhouse!) loves. Besides, the new route fit in with road detour.

I went in to get some marigolds and found little French marigolds that I love. On the way to finding them I found 2 intriguing plants I'd never seen before. I got my marigolds, picked up the mesmerizing new plants and left without looking at anything else. Good grief! I could have spent thousands (on the plants and the hired labor to put them in the ground) had I looked around.

Then I took the long way home. On gravel roads.

Long Way Home

I would like to report that my tomatoes are now planted. But they're not. The wind was strong today and the plants are huge. They would have gotten whipped to shit.

Big Tomatoes

I did manage to get the marigolds in the ground and watered. Tomorrow we are under a "wind advisory". Just when you think you've hit the apex of windiness, you're wrong. The tomatoes will have to live until after Memorial Day. I have to get ready for a visit from Miss H and Mr. B.

Sort Of Like Capistrano

2009-05-08T16:15:00.000-05:00

On May 1 I saw my first barn swallow of the year. This morning I opened the shop door and a couple of swallows hovered near the door, wondering if they could get in and start building nests. (No.) When I finished phase one of my project, the doors got closed again. Poor little birdies would not have been able to get out again.

Mom was right about the orioles returning the first part of May. Yesterday as I stumbled to the kitchen for my second cup of coffee I noticed an oriole sitting on the seed feeder. I ran outside, hung the jelly feeder and plopped jelly in the cups. I came back in the house thinking I'd frightened the oriole and I wouldn't see him again for days. I looked out the window and he was sitting on the feeder eating jelly. He's been active today, too, but very camera shy.

Today was rose breasted grosbeak day. I've seen two of them! The goldfinches are thick and fighting over sunflower chips and thistle seed. There are more Harris' and white capped sparrows than the boring house sparrows. It's starting to get colorful!

I Made Dirt!

2009-05-03T18:30:00.002-05:00

And I couldn't be happier about it. Here is my beautiful compost.

My compost

I don't think peach pits ever break down. The pile was full of them. There were egg shell pieces in there, too. I think I'm going to start smashing the egg shells up before I add them to the pile. I also found lots of squash seeds, but they were just shells. I love my new dirt!

The weather has been fantastic the last couple of days. The goldfinches have returned to my little corner of the prairie and are fighting over their feeders. Any day now I now the orioles will return. In the mean time, this little varmint sneaks out to clean up. His cheeks are stuffed.

Varmint

One Of Many Problems

2009-04-30T18:55:00.002-05:00

I am working on my own website to tout my abilities and show off work I have done. Hopefully, I will drum up more work.

I have had the domain name and space on a server for at least 2 years and for all of that time there has been a static page with a link to my recently updated (community) college portfolio.

The problem? Now that I have settled on a look for my site, I am having trouble tooting my own horn. When I did my horn tooting for my college portfolio, I just thought of my main instructor who knew absolutely nothing about what she was getting paid the big bucks to teach and outlined my accomplishments. I made myself look like a self taught prodigy.

Now it just looks sad to me. I am good at shooting myself in the foot so I don't know if my previous horn tooting is solid, slightly stretched reality or total bullshit.

And here is another problem: I am pj of notmyrabbit here. Only persistent and relatively sane people people know who I am. (Crab falls in only one of those catagories. Easy to guess which one.) I don't even use my whole real name on Facebook, where I can be crude and rude. Crude and rude has no place on a professional website.

I cannot link my site to my blog. It has way too much personal information. I am one big chicken!

I am ready for advice and will send the link to my current site to the persistent, relatively sane people who ask. You can be honest and tell me I'm in the wrong line of work then hire me to herd cats or something.

Swine Flu In Iowa

2009-04-28T06:26:00.002-05:00

Here are some things I learned on the local news last night.

It is not a matter of if the flu will come, it is a matter of when. (Cue ominous music)
Don't travel! Especially don't go to Mexico!
You cannot get swine flu from eating pork products or contact with a pork producer. Unless, one would have to assume, the pork producer had just come home from Mexico with flu symptoms.

So before you hug your neighborhood pork producer, make sure he hasn't been doing something stupid like vacationing in Mexico.

Since You Asked...

2009-04-21T17:55:00.002-05:00

There has been a clamoring for information! O.K., one person asked a question. This will teach her.

Birding has not been very exciting. The black birds (brown headed cowbirds, red wings and grackles) are thick. The blue jays added color to my winter but have abandoned me this spring. The goldfinches always leave me in the winter (my folks have them all year) and come back in the spring. The other day I saw a couple but haven't seen them since. I think they want me to fill up the thistle seed feeder.

Today I saw a house finch, which is much more colorful than a house sparrow. I have been watching the fox sparrows scratching and hopping under the cedars. Also in the sparrow department there have been Harris' sparrows.

One day I saw a hermit thrush but he didn't hang around. Same with a red-bellied woodpecker.

The mourning doves have returned. They're sweet.

I am ready for the orioles. And if I filled my thistle feeder, I would be ready for the indigo buntings, too. I look forward to all the transients.

Much more exciting birding at my parents on Easter. I couldn't tell you how many different kinds of birds I saw. I have resigned myself to the fact that I don't live in a major flyway and until a river flows in my back yard and acres of trees sprout up, I won't.

The Color Of The Day: Sweet, Tender Green

2009-04-17T18:31:00.002-05:00

The trees are budding and the grass is turning green. The black birds (grackles, redwings, brown headed cowbirds) are innumerable and cacophonous. They also account for most of the activity at my bird feeder. I put out oranges today in anticipation of the orioles. They will arrive soon, I hope.

Some of the sweet, tender green:

Lilac buds

Cottonwood buds

I can't wait for the cottonwood fluff! It is more fun than snow and just as pretty.

Birds in the willows

My poor linden tree

My poor linden tree has seen better days. Looks like it has been making the woodpeckers happy, though.

Branches

Another color of the day: black. As in birds and dirt. It's planting time!

Planting with birds

This is not a product endorsement

Life Out Here

2009-03-31T21:30:00.002-05:00

Yes. I live. In spite of the efforts of the universe to crush my spirit to dust. I have proof of my existence. I have been taking photos even though I have been very lax in posting and commenting on them.

Misc.

Fungus. Very dead, but I still keep it around.

New cat

The new cat amuses herself.

Have you ever heard (or had the experience) that you buy a kid an expensive toy and wait anxiously for them to enjoy the hell out of it only to find they are playing with the box the toy came in? That is what this cat is doing to me. I bought her a frigging play station with dingles, dangles and scratching posts. Her favorite toys? The bathroom rugs and the dog's food. Really, I think she likes the dog's food the best. And the very best thing is to scoot dog food under the rug.

Bowling

The season never seems to end. I'm sick of it and yet -- it is the only time I see people. Except for my weekly shopping. Which is not "shopping", it is going to town and buying shit. Big difference.

The entire bowling alley. I'm not kidding!

You know what's really funny about this 6 lane alley? Every week one team has to bowl alone (the blind) because we only have 5 teams of 4 women. Move here! Join the Strikettes! Make things interesting! Any team than I am on will still be in last place. You have a chance to make the sports news in the local paper every week.

Waiting for spring

Hope springs eternal. I haven't been kvetching about the long, arduous winter like I did last year because I foolishly thought spring was here on March 20.

Long before that I started some petunias. It is something I have never done before but this year tried it with seeds I harvested from dead petunias. Have you ever seen a petunia seed? They are smaller than a period in one of these sentences.

I planted them and gave up on them. But they didn't give up on me. They actually sprouted.

Teeny tiny tunias.

What spring?

Still waiting for spring. Flurries here and there. Windy. Dreary.

You can't see it, but there is snow.

I Love Him More Today Than Yesterday (But Not As Much As Tomorrow)

2009-03-13T19:19:00.002-05:00

If he breaks my heart I will die. Or go on a rampage and never, ever trust another human being again.

I am talking about Obama, of course.

~~~~~~~~~~~UPDATE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I started this post a long time ago, got interrupted, and didn't get back to it until now.

It was written after Obama's address to Congress and contained various gushy stuff (love him! love Michelle!) and snarky stuff (Ruth Bader Ginsberg's doily over her Justice robe) and notes on what Obama said. I took notes during the speech because I wanted to be prepared for bowling night.

It turns out that the congressional speech was not discussed at bowling but the address to the nation a few weeks earlier had been. From that discourse (I bit my tongue for a change and was all ears) I learned that: he talked in circles during his press conference and said nothing; the stimulus package is full of pork that will benefit big business; the damned Democratic Congress will rubber stamp anything Obama says; that under Obama's health care plan you will no longer be able to choose your own doctor; and Obama is trying to turn this into a socialist country.

I'm glad I didn't have to argue Obama's case after the Congressional address. It would have been a waste of air. I am in the wrong place, or I am thinking wrong. I must be thinking wrong. The letters to the editor in the local paper tell me so! The other bowlers tell me so!

I think I'm going to be stubborn and contrary just a bit longer. And bite my tongue often. You will recognize me and others like me by the blood dripping down our chins.

Fun With The Animals

2009-03-13T18:28:00.004-05:00

I'm Alive

2009-02-18T19:36:00.003-06:00

I see that before tonight the last time I posted was January 23. Thanks for calling to see if I was still alive.

I have had two people this month check on my viability. Crab doesn't count.

This is what I spent on gas from December 29 2008 and January 29 2009: $21.39.

I don't get out much. When I get in my car to make my weekly shopping trip (as I did today), I realize the last time I was in the car was Thursday night the week before when I went to league bowling.

I'm doing my part to save the planet. And I am still driving around with a burned out CFL bulb in my car.

Always About Weather

2009-02-18T19:19:00.004-06:00

Today was kind of a crappy day. Right now the wind is blowing hard and it reminded me of the last time the wind blew hard. I thought this old house would implode.

It didn't, but the lights went out. It afforded me the opportunity to cook by candle light with the aid of a small flashlight in my mouth.

Cooking by candle light.

Dining by candle light

The lights weren't out for very long and we didn't freeze. The temps had been unseasonably warm for days and we lost our lane glacier and snow cover in flat places. Piled snow, drifted snow and snow filled ditches remain.

Today was a mixed bag of flurries and spitting stuff. I was compelled to replace my windshield wipers when in Big Town. The kid that sold them to me actually went out and replaced the blades for me. I could tell the passenger side blade was too short but by that time I didn't care. I had new blades that worked and got to go home and listen to the wind whistle through this old house.

We Are Here

2009-01-23T11:51:00.002-06:00

Again

January Thaw Preview

2009-01-21T19:55:00.002-06:00

The January thaw is coming tomorrow! One day above freezing is something to get excited about. Late this afternoon I went for a short walk with Gretchen and took some preview pics.

Gretchen

Gretchen's butt

The corn stalks glow in the light

The 911 address sign has ruined this for me

I mean really. No one lives there. Why does it need a frigging sign?

Drift

RR Xing

Tracks

I can't believe a collector hasn't snagged these insulators

Scrub trees

Fence Line

More fence

I hope you enjoyed the photo walk. Tomorrow I will be going to the supermarket. I don't think it will be a photo journey.

Getting Comfortable

2009-01-21T19:43:00.002-06:00

The new cat, Skittles, is continuing to make her place in the family. Sometimes I think she is channeling her most recent predecessor. Tonight she climbed up the back of my chair, over my shoulder and into my lap, demanding the attention she felt she deserved.

Here she is finally getting brave with the giant Mouse:

Attack!

It is futile to resist!

The Gown

2009-01-20T21:14:00.004-06:00

Dress from the front

She couldn't control the thing and kept tugging at it.

The back, close

The back

This has nothing to do with the dress, but wouldn't that hurt after a while?

I Have No Room To Talk -- But...

2009-01-20T20:13:00.002-06:00

Michelle Obama's gown looks like a chenille bedspread.

She looked gorgeous on election night. She has a great figure and could wear anything. So why would she drape herself in the spread off the bed?

I leafed through pictures of gowns designers were begging her to wear. Most were stunning. This thing is not becoming at all.

Like I said, I have no room to talk sitting here in a dirty sweatshirt and jeans. This is not the biggest problem our country faces. But OMG, that dress is horrible.

Inaguration (Part Two)

2009-01-20T11:09:00.002-06:00

"Please stand while Barack Obama takes the oath of office."

I stood in front of the TV.

I wasn't instructed to, but I cried.

The time has come at last.

Inaguration (Part One?)

2009-01-20T09:47:00.003-06:00

I've been listening to NPR all morning. I finally flipped on the tube and the first thing I saw was Dick Cheney in a wheelchair.

Wow, he's getting out of there in the nick of time.

Or so I thought. Turns out he pulled a muscle in his back while moving into his new digs.

Hurry up. Give us a new administration already.

A Poem

2009-01-15T19:09:00.002-06:00

I got a forward today that I enjoyed because the sentiment within was oh, so true. Well, mostly true. The winds were not 70 mph today (yesterday they were 40) but if the actual temperature does not get above -11, WTF does it matter? Cold is cold.

It's winter in Iowa
And the gentle breezes blow
Seventy miles an hour
At twenty-five below.

Oh, how I love Iowa
When the snow's up to your butt.
You take a breath of winter
And your nose gets frozen shut.

Yes, the weather here is wonderful
So I guess I'll hang around.
I could never leave Iowa
'Cause I'm frozen to the ground!

I really am frozen to the ground because my trusty Subaru would not start today. Not even after the wonderful neighbor came over to jump it. We messed with it for over half an hour til my fingers and toes were frozen. Wonderful Neighbor told me that it is supposed to warm up tonight and by midnight the temps will be above zero. One can only dream.... And surf the internet.... And write blog posts....

Asked and Answered

2009-01-14T08:48:00.004-06:00

Captain Crab asked this morning, "How Cold Is It?"

Today is is cold enough for sundogs.

Left Sun Dog

Right Sun Dog

Mush reports spring-like conditions in Walla Walla, Washington and is happy to be away from "that Midwestern-style frozen tundra crap". Frozen tundra is an apt description of what I see out my front door.

Snow blowing on the tundra

The good deed of the neighbor has been undone but I'm sure he will return with his snow moving machine after the wind stops. If the wind stops? I don't want to think it...

Neighbors

2009-01-13T10:46:00.002-06:00

Where would we be without them? Our neighbors make sure our lane is cleared.

Here the neighbor is building up our "snow fence". It really helps control the drifting.

It really is a beautiful day, if you don't mind temps of -9F. I was snapping pictures and it wasn't too bad. Except for my fingers and toes which starting losing feeling after a couple of minutes. The neighbor stepped out of the cab to chat for a minute and was only wearing a hooded sweatshirt over his shirt. It must be pretty toasty in that tractor!

Thanks A Lot, Al. Now What?

2009-01-07T18:07:00.007-06:00

Inspired by my friend, Al Gore, and his movie about global warming, I bought CFL light bulbs. They're great! They save energy! They last a long, long time!

The down side is that the CFL's contain mercury. Heaven forbid you should break one in your kitchen. Call the Haz Mat team!

Last week I had my first burn out. I learned there is no "green" way to dispose of them. At least not around here, according to my internet search. I emailed the regional recycling center to find out what I should do.

A homeowner can throw away a few in the garbage. That is all we have in place at the present time.

A few? What if all 5 of my kitchen bulbs burned out? Could I throw all 5 of them away at once, or would I have to wait between tossings? And how do I know how many have been tossed by other people? And wait, I don't own my home! Can renters throw them away?

I have a CFL bulb in it's original hard plastic package sitting on the floor of my car in case CFL recycling boxes start popping up. Or maybe I'll throw it in a dumpster in a town farther away. I'm open for suggestions, people!

Getting To Know You

2009-01-04T10:16:00.002-06:00

For those who missed Crab's announcement, we have adopted a new kitty. On December 30, Crab went to the Humane Society and picked out a cat. It is a good thing I didn't go because I might have come home with all the cats.

Here she is eating her first meal. She didn't even have a name yet.

First Meal

She was awful shy and hid a lot. I had to put her up on the new kitty play station as she wasn't brave enough yet to jump on things.

Play Station

We decided to name her Skittles. She decided to be braver and explore the house.

She found the toilet! I missed the shot of her with her paws in the water.

There's food bits in the sink strainer!

They just don't make pom poms like they used to!

It is fun to have a lively kitten around again.

Just A Cat

2008-12-17T18:07:00.002-06:00

After Felix appeared to be recovering from his stroke I watched for signs of his normal behavior. When he tried eating food out of his paw I was elated. It was another sign he was returning to his old self.

I was anxious for him to be able to jump up on things again. Like the desk in the kitchen, where the cats are fed out of reach of the dog. Or to jump on the dryer -- whenever a load of clothes were thrown in the dryer, Felix would jump up on the towel I kept there for him. Sometimes he would be so full of joy rolling around that he would fall off.

Felix would get so ecstatic when he was petted. But it wasn't enough to pet him -- he wanted to be in our faces. He would drape himself across our shoulders and rub his face against ours. There were times I thought he'd crawl down my throat if he could.

With Crab

With Me

I wanted to see the behavior that annoyed me, too. Like when the waterer was empty and Felix would jump on the toilet seat and bang, bang, bang the lid until I got up and gave him water. Or how he'd get excited when the birds were feeding and he would jump on my printer, run across the kitchen counter and stand by the sink looking out the kitchen window at the bird feeder, flip, flip, flipping his tail.

Sometimes I would look at my printer and see several copies that Felix had printed out of whatever happened to be in the scanner. Or I'd try to print something to discover that Felix had turned the printer off. He was also good at making flying jumps to look out the living room window sending my paperwork and books flying.

Crab was missing the Felix that slept with him. He tried to take Felix to bed one night but the bed was so high. Felix had been sleeping on a heating pad on the floor since his stroke. He was confused and not happy so Crab put him back in his safe spot.

But Felix was getting better! He started to come into the bathroom every time I went in there, hoping for some good petting while I was occupied on the throne. That went on for several days, then stopped.

He started sleeping more and eating less. Then he needed to be spoon fed again. I worked at getting enough food in him at each feeding.

Then we reached the end. No miracle stroke recovery stories. The end.

There is this perspective -- he was just a cat. One of many billions in the world. He was a cat I didn't want and a cat I was angry at much of the time. I will be finding his snot surprises for months to come, I'm sure. When I dug that hole weeks ago, I didn't dig under the cedar trees for fear of digging up the grave of one of many his predecessors. He was just a cat.

But I miss him.

Felix

Humorless

2008-12-10T20:15:00.002-06:00

When H was little, she would freak at bugs. Once when I was photographing her as a diminutive beauty queen on her tricycle on the front stoop she started screaming. For no reason, it seemed to me. But OMG! A ladybug had landed on her handlebars!

Before the ladybug landed

"Ladybugs are our friends," I told her. "They eat aphids which destroy good plants."

She was not convinced.

At that time one of the older buildings on the farm was still standing. Inside the walls was a beehive. I used to hold my hand on the side of the building and feel the activity inside. I loved my bees.

The bees traveled around the farm looking for food and H freaked whenever she encountered one.

"If you don't bother them, they won't bother you and they will fly away. Bees are our friends! They pollinate plants and make wonderful honey."

She was not convinced.

Fast forward to today. The building and that bee hive are long gone. H is a grown up big girl. Bees are disappearing from the planet at an alarming rate.

She sent me one of those email stories with photos about what happens when you don't clean your BBQ grill. The photo story started with the chemical bomb the dude used to kill bees when he saw some bees coming out from under the cover of his grill. The next photo showed dead bees piled up under the grill -- "a 20mm deep mass grave". (Must not be a US grill cleaner because he'd measure in inches)

So the bees are dead, the dude is happy and until --

He discovers all the honeycombs under the grill! What a mess to clean! Poor dude!

I think H sent this to me in the spirit of "That's Incredible!", but I am a humorless bitch.

Another Cat Update >^..^<

2008-12-03T18:40:00.002-06:00

Today Felix moved around to avoid the vacuum cleaner instead of lying on the heating pad.

He is becoming more aware!

Felix Update

2008-11-27T18:10:00.002-06:00

We've reached a milestone or two. Felix is eating a whole serving of food at time without me spooning it into his mouth. Better yet, I don't have to hold him while he eats. We can break the association of my lap with food.

I saw a glimmer of old Felix this morning when he reached his paw into his dish. He used to do that with the dried food -- reach in and dig out a chunk and eat out of his paw. Only the food didn't always stay in his paw long enough for him to eat it and there was always a mess around the dish.

I dreamed last night that he jumped up on the counter. But alas, it was only a dream. He eats, he drinks, he sleeps on the heating pad, he uses his box. Pretty good for a cat that was this [] close to going into a hole in the ground last week.

Thanks for the good kitty wishes! >^..^<

One Life Down, Eight to Go

2008-11-25T18:42:00.003-06:00

Remember Felix?

Last Tuesday Felix was acting weird. He walked up against the end table table legs and looked at me and meowed and meowed. It was like he couldn't figure out how to move himself. I picked him up and tried putting him in his favorite resting spots, but he struggled to get out of them and kept heading back towards those table legs. He wasn't moving right. His left leg kept folding up underneath him.

He finally made it to where he wanted to be -- curled up on the carpet next to the heat register. I decided two things. 1. Felix wanted to be warm. 2. Felix was dying.

I wanted to make him comfortable while he peacefully died. I covered the heating pad with a flannel pillow case and put in near his warm spot. He soon found it.

On Wednesday, he staggered out, got a drink, used the box and went back to the heating pad. I'd bought a couple of cans of cat food and fed him a tablespoon or so and gave him some water with the bulb syringe.

On Thursday, I fed him some more of the canned food. Then I went out and dug a hole for the inevitible burial. Then Felix groomed himself. Got more water. Used the box and went back to bed. He really rallied.

On Friday he ate the rest of the can of food. It was no small task -- I'd given up on H's baby spoon and was using my fingers to put food in his mouth. He chewed gratefully, sometimes on my fingers. I made a wooden spoon out of a big popsicle stick with my Dremel. He knew he wanted food -- he just wasn't sure how to get it.

And I have been holding him in my lap at least twice a day, spooning food into his mouth. He comes out to drink and use his box, I guess. I haven't monitored his every move. Every day he is a little more active but he always returns to the heating pad.

Crab and I decided he had a stroke. His left leg still folds sometimes when he moves and he often circles to the right. I looked cat strokes up on the web and see that many cats recover from strokes. So I'm hoping for the best. I don't know how long I can stuff stinky food into his mouth. A hole awaits him if my patience runs out.

Ch - Ch- Changes

2008-11-08T08:40:00.002-06:00

On Tuesday it was 72 degrees. On Wednesday, it was 65. Still great weather for November in Iowa. On Thursday, the rain moved in.

It only looks icy.

But the day after that -- well, this is what I woke up to.

Snow on the Subaru

The most important change happened on Tuesday. I am still basking in the glow even if Barack Obama has rolled up his sleeves and gone to work. I think about the election and our new president all the time. I am so happy. So proud. So hopeful.

Can I Take This Down Now?

2008-11-04T19:33:00.002-06:00

This has been on the side of my frig for a few years. I'm sure my right-leaning neighbors gagged whenever they walked into my house since the side of my frig is the first thing you see.

Please tell me the party's over!

I think I will save this image in my trunk with the newspapers of 9/11, the floods and Hurricane Katrina. It belongs with the disasters.

Super Happy Funtime is doing her best to keep me posted and upbeat. Click your heels three times... We're almost home....

Is It Over Yet?

2008-11-04T16:22:00.002-06:00

There are no results posted anywhere that I have seen. Believe me, I have been checking. The most I've gotten done today is voting, surfing, posting and eating lunch.

To provide substance to this post, I'll add some corn pictures. We are still enjoying unseasonably balmy temps. The farmers are hurrying to clear the fields before (oh, how I hate to say this) the snow comes on Friday. It is 70 degrees right now. On Election Day! Prepare for many months of me complaining about the weather.

Mountains in Iowa

Building mountains, one load at a time.

K Town covered in dust.

It's not snow yet!

Still not snow!

The dust machine.

I Am Beside Myself

2008-11-04T11:05:00.003-06:00

I have a fluttery feeling in my stomach. I can't concentrate. I want to start celebrating but am afraid the boogey man will take over all the voting machines to spite me.

I waited until 10 to vote because I wanted to avoid the crush when the doors opened. If you knew my polling place, you would laugh. Here is a short tour of the Greenfield Township polling center:

Click to see the big picture!

The lovely election ladies help Kelcie

Kelcie wanted to try the touch machine.

I used one of the booths to fill in my ovals.

My reward. Well, that and a new president.

Now that I have voted I have time to drive to Chicago for Obama's party in the park. But I will sit, spin and obsess here instead. Tomorrow is a great new day!

Lines

2008-11-03T08:40:00.002-06:00

This blog is brought to you by electrical lines.

Flower Lines

Love Line?

Sky Line

Rail Lines

Gretchen's Big Adventure

2008-11-01T16:13:00.003-05:00

I loaded up Gretchen this morning and we went to my mom's, a place she's never been. I've never taken her before because Gretch is conveniently deaf and I was afraid I wouldn't be able to control her. My fears were unfounded. She behaved and had a wonderful time. People, you know Gretchen is my dog, and I am not depriving a grandchild of seeing her grandma.

It was such a gorgeous, wonderful, unbelievable day. This is November??

We started out through the walnut woods. The dense woods around the house are trees that my parents planted themselves.

When we got close to the river Gretchen found the rivulet and wallowed in the shallow, muddy water like a pig. We were laughing so hard I didn't get a picture. Not to worry about the mud, though, Gretchen discovered the river itself soon enough and took a bath.

Mom watching Gretch swim.

Most of the trees they planted were walnut and pine but they did plant a few oaks.

Oak tree

My mom's favorite tree is one that was already there, a hackberry. It has great arms that beg you to climb up and sit on them.

Favorite from afar

We used to go to Mom's to get our Christmas trees but the trees are way to big now. Right before I took this picture, an owl flew out of the pine forest.

I left mom's with a trunk full of garden goodies and a tired dog in the back seat. I'm going to wake the dog up so we can go out into the fields to pick up food for this guy:

Crab Asked For It

2008-10-16T08:00:00.002-05:00

Get your shirt now.

Fun With Graphics

2008-10-15T19:56:00.002-05:00

If you are watching the debates tonight remember:

The Alaska Disasta

2008-10-01T18:45:00.004-05:00

I was greatly cheered today when I received an email from H about the Alaska Women Reject Palin rally. It told the story of the rally and had several pictures attached. I wanted to believe it, but I have been fooled before. So I pulled a Reagan. I trusted, but I verified.

The first googly result was Mudflats, a blog written by an Alaska resident. I bookmarked the site right after the coronation of Queen Sarah but haven't checked it much since. Read the story for yourself and enjoy the pictures. It warms me to my toes.

Mudflats

Ask Me Why I'm Palinoid, Keep Your Church Out of My State, Bush in a Skirt and many more! Go read it now!

Subject: FW: HARLEY.... Any questions ?

2008-09-26T12:55:00.004-05:00

Food for thought.

I'm telling you folks, this should be all you need to know to make the right choice.

Palin

Obama

Note:
Her Harley is made in the US and his bike is made in China.....

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Wow! Thanks! All I need to make my decision on election day! You forgot to mention that she can field dress a moose! Another plus!

Catching Up

2008-09-24T19:29:00.002-05:00

I'm behind in everything it seems. I want to post but posting causes me as much angst as Hannita choosing a church. I want to keep it simple and my posts digress in my mind and that causes procrastination.

I took a mental laxative so here we go...

One thing I've wanted to tell the world is that after kvetching constantly about the winter weather and spring flooding, the month of August was absolutely SUBLIME. The days were sunny, warm and not overly humid. The nights were cool. Air conditioning was only needed when the kitchen heated up with canning. I had no complaints, so therefore, no weather posts.

On Labor Day I watched a dear man water ski on his 80th birthday. Please click on the picture to actually see the skier.

Labor day ended up being rather warmish -- but still, no complaints about the weather! Ask me, I can find other things to complain about. I took pictures of the sun going down that day. Again, click on the picture to see the sun!

The weather turned colder for a week or so, but OMG, it has been glorious since then. Like August was, only there with the specter of fall looming. I'm loving the weather, but dreading the sudden snap that will probably come.

Yesterday we had thunderstorms. Field work stopped when lightning was in the air and machinery was driven to safety. It rained like hell and left big puddles.

Click This!

Now I am going to retreat back into my hidey-hole until I learn Joomla. If you don't hear from me again, you'll know it killed me.

Gardening

2008-09-12T17:23:00.002-05:00

I am not as good at gardening as my mother. I tried to start my own flowers this year. I started really early, thinking it would be a good thing. But spring was late in coming and my plants got very leggy. I transplanted them and nursed them along. I took the leggiest ones which I had labeled "mexican sunflowers" and stuck them in the ground without hardening them off, telling them they were on their own. They got frosted and snowed on and, needless to say, did not survive.

Finally the real spring came and I planted the balsam by the front door. The plan was to have something about 18 inches high, colorful and attractive to butterflies in front of the house. Like this:

When my flowers bloomed I knew something was terribly wrong! They were all orange, not the mixed colored balsam I'd planted. And they bushed out and grew taller and taller and started looking a lot like, well, mexican sunflowers. Finally I realized I need to refine my plant labeling system instead of expressing outrage to a company over mislabeled seeds that cost me a couple of bucks.

I went out yesterday and pruned them back so I could get to the door. I took this pic at my eye level.

At least the butterflies love them!

Response

2008-09-09T18:32:00.002-05:00

This is a response, in part, to a comment on my last post about my bowling teammate who was a GW lover.

When the Dems and the Others were running all over Iowa and battling it out to be nominated by their parties, my sister in law who lives in PA wrote me :

Man has Iowa really turned as conservative as the PBS news makes it out to be?

All this talk of ministers scares me....if they threw out the ones commiting all the 'sins' there wouldn't be any left.

I responded to her as such:

I guess it depends on where you are how conservative the people are. I like it when I am surprised by a liberal person. Gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling. And there are plenty of us! Just not so many in the country (there are urban areas in Iowa, really).

I think the majority of Iowa's conservatives are just dumb-ass rednecks that haven't ventured far enough out of their safety zone to realize not everyone thinks like them. (Or is WHITE, or CHRISTIAN) Such a thing is really unimaginable for them. It is so sad.

I learned a lot when I was tending bar and wore my "Dean for President" t shirt. Holy shit. You would have thought my shirt said "I Murder Babies" or "Give Me All Your Money Because I Refuse To Work and You Owe Me".

Before the war in Iraq I got into a heated discussion with a Bush lover who wanted the war. His reasoning: He wanted every child in Iraq to have the opportunities American children have. Which was total bullshit. He went on to say that Americans owned all of the oil in the middle east because Americans were the ones who found it and developed all the wells and refineries. He was serious. I was scared.

And I am still scared.

Bowling Disasters

2008-09-05T19:09:00.002-05:00

Bowling started a week ago last Thursday so I've had two nights of the new season under my belt. Bad news: I bowled really well (for me) both nights.

This is bad because I am establishing an average that I cannot hope to maintain. I know how I bowl. I bowl fairly well and never consistently. Many, many nights I am hoping to break 100 so I don't look too stupid.

Night 1 of Bowling:
I got into a political discussion with a teammate about the Iowa legislature. The discussion started out innocently enough but then took a couple of bizarre jumps and then went on a rocket ship to la-la land when teammate professed a dying love and devotion for George W. Bush. It was a gigantic and strange leap that left my jaw on the floor for a full minute.

I told Teamie that we could never, ever, EVER discuss politics again.

I should have learned this lesson long ago. Crab keeps telling me, I keep ignoring him. Lesson: If you are enjoying someone's company, don't spoil it by talking about things which may reveal your friend is on the other end of the spectrum. (Not to mention completely delusional and oh, so WRONG!)

I was bummed out all week by that exchange. I was swimming in a sea of red voters and was about to drown.

Night 2 of Bowling:
In spite of the RNC being in full swing (too bad that a little rain in Florida and the pressure from the liberal media made them miss a day of partying) I went to bowling last night with a determination to enjoy myself and not talk politics.

I had made a nifty pair of bowling shoe covers with non-skid pajama feet bottoms to cover my shoes when traipsing around beyond the lanes. Keep your bowling shoes slick! Sliding is everything!

After the first game I covered my shoes and took a little break. When I got back from break a new game was starting. It was my turn! I took my ball, made my aim, took careful, measured steps while bringing the ball back.... ready.... aim.... step.... step.... step....

And fall over the foul line onto the oiled lanes. The non-skid pajama feet bottoms really work.

A Pictorial Review of My Big Adventure

2008-08-24T17:31:00.003-05:00

I spent the greater part of my great escape at H's. This is one of the first sights / sounds I experienced there. I didn't think I'd be able to sleep at night but my brain must have treated the planes overhead like the trains that rumble by our place. They didn't bother me at all.

I spent much of time at H's on her elevated deck, spying on the neighbors and looking into the trees.

And I got to spend time with my grandkitties. In this picture it is my precious Trixie who is being naughty and naughty Bella who is being shy.

On my second night we ventured into St. Paul. H drove, of course. Until we drove by this, I had no idea that the Republican National Convention was being held there. Now that I know where it is being held, I know where I am NOT going to be until the red dust settles.

This had no interest for me either. Star Wars stopped being fun for me after they started making prequels.

We eventually parked and went to Garrison Keillor's book store, Common Good Books. This is a backdrop for some scenes from Chasing Windmills in which Hulles is a star. Follow the Hulles link to find CW.

I loved this part of St. Paul. I want H to make tons and tons of money and buy a mansion here with room for me. H in the city:

One night we took the light rail to to Minneapolis. I wish I would have been braver with my camera and taken pictures of the Viking ~~freaks~~ fans. But alas and alack, I have no pictures of the trains, station, riders, or people waiting to board.

We walked to the heart of Minneapolis. This has to be the heart, because here is Mary Tyler Moore. Only I don't think it looks a thing like her.

As we passed this sculpture in front of a church, a kid whispered to his parents, "They're naked!"

There are other things I wish I would have photographed. Like the swallows nesting in the liquor store sign (for Captain Crab), the brat at the light rail station shoving paper into the credit card slot of the automatic ticket machine, the sign at the station about holding on to your children and keeping them away from the edge of the platform, the same brat hanging her toes over the edge of the platform, and the woman in the liquor store wearing a tube top made from a pair of men's jockey shorts. And to think I was worried about what to wear in the city.

Lovely Veggies

2008-08-17T16:44:00.003-05:00

It was sweet corn time this week and I went to my folks to get some corn to freeze. It was not a great year for corn with the sporadic rains not arriving at the best time. Still, I got plenty of corn to freeze.

Every year when I get corn my mom recalls my dad's mom at corn freezing time. Grandma would work away at shucking, silking, cutting and freezing corn and say, "What lovely corn!"

Before I left Mom asked if I wanted green beans. I told her I'd picked some up the day before at the farmer's market in Jeremy Freese's home town. She asked how the beans were and I said, "lovely".

"As lovely as these?" Mom asked as she showed me a 5 gallon bucket of huge green beans.

So compare:

I took some of Mom's beans and the day after I froze corn, I froze beans. Mom also cut a tomato off the vine for me to take home:

I tipped the scales some holding the measuring tape. The tomato weighed just under 3 pounds. But it really was 18 ⅝ inches around.

One of these days I need to make a trip out to my own tomatoes and do something with them. I love the abundance of fresh vegetables. I get tired quickly of putting food by.

I'm Alive!

2008-08-12T18:51:00.003-05:00

Holy cow. My last post was July 22? Really? What can I say, I've been busy.

I was involved in a small town celebration (tiny K town) that was held the first Saturday in August. It was our 2nd annual and it was awesome. H came and ran the kid's games. There was softball for bigger "kids". The food was great. Weather wise, it was the best day Iowa has ever seen.

Preparations leading up to K Daze were brutal. And when it was over, I still had stuff to do. Stuff I haven't finished yet because.....

Then it was my birthday! And I did something I haven't done in a long, long time. I ran away from home leaving Captain Crab home alone to take care of the critters. I went to visit H in the big, bad Twin Cities. It was great to hang with her in her environment and spy on her neighbors when she was at work. H, I'm telling you, the nurse across the street IS having an affair with a married man.

We did some touristy stuff (I think it's obligatory) like visit Garrison Keillor's bookstore in downtown St. Paul and ride the light rail to downtown Minneapolis (along with the purple tide of Viking's fans on the way to a pre-season game).

I learned my way around her neighborhood and, most importantly, got over my fear of driving in Minneapolis. It was a wonderful vacation and I am so glad I went. Cities are nice to visit but I'm glad I'm home in the land of not having to drive 70 mph to keep from getting run over.

But now I'm behind in everything, it seems. I have still have work to do for K Daze, a client's website to update and a new client I really, really, REALLY need to make website headway on. And I am without my computer.

I took it in to my geek before I left for the cities to have it tuned up and more RAM installed. (Sorry, Mush, I know you are cringing but I am not that friggin smart!) It would be done by now had I not asked for more RAM, which comes from the RAM store in Timbuktu and is shipped to Iowa by camel.

Crab is gone and so I have access to a computer, but not my programs. I am so jonesing for my machine. It is all I can do to keep from installing Firefox on Crab's computer, installing programs that will suck up his hard drive and configuring it like mine. I am trying to be a good guest and leave things just as I found them, so I will refrain from fucking up his computer.

Storm

2008-07-22T18:56:00.002-05:00

One night last week the radar told me a storm was very, very close to me. I went out to see for myself and discovered the radar was right.

I high tailed it back to the house and a few minutes later shot the rain from the shelter of the porch (Captain Crab's swallow nest in the corner).

It rained hard.

Hulles Lives

2008-07-22T18:30:00.002-05:00

Once prolific blogger Hulles has been missing in action for some time. I feared for his life. But last Saturday I saw the living, breathing Hulles with my own eyes.

Hulles Lives

He promised to start writing again soon.

Family Jewels

2008-07-18T17:54:00.002-05:00

My mother is a ruby and my aunt (her sister) is a pearl. Mom has honed her gardening skills to producing enough fruit and vegetables to feed half the county. Aunt Pearl has taken her little yard and turned it into a showcase of day lilies. Pearl has been sending me pictures of her flowers. Here are some of them. I didn't save all the pictures she sent me because, well, my computer is already filled with pictures.

Not My Rabbit

More 'Nuff

'Nuff Said

Easter & Stuff

Christmas and Beyond

Deflated

Bermuda Triangle

Retrospect

Labor Pains

Change In The Weather

Chit Chat

Anti-Social

August 7, 2010

Coupon Lady

The End Of July

WTF

Office Kitties

Storms

I Need Crab

Rejection

Bob's Back

Bad Parenting / Snatched From the Jaws of Death

Good Grief

It's About Time

Your Eyes Would Bleed

March

News Flash

It Just Gets Better And Better

Changes

Santa's Last Legs

My Yoville House

Catching Up

October

November

December

Every Thing I Touch

Trouble

Needle In A Haystack

KER-THUNK

Bye, Bye Summer

Speechless - You Wish

Fines proposed for going without health insurance

Noblesse Oblige

PS

Save Big Money (and get pissed off)

Stay Off My Road!

Summer So Far

Coolest Wedding Thanks Ever

It's About Blooming Time

I Hate The Interstate

Petey Must Die

Gardening Stuff & Bird Notes

Memorial For Ringo

More Procrastination From Yesterday

Danger Will Robinson!

Dear Jerry

Take The Long Way Home

Sort Of Like Capistrano

I Made Dirt!

One Of Many Problems

Swine Flu In Iowa

Since You Asked...

The Color Of The Day: Sweet, Tender Green

Life Out Here

Misc.

New cat

Bowling

Waiting for spring

What spring?

I Love Him More Today Than Yesterday (But Not As Much As Tomorrow)

Fun With The Animals

I'm Alive

Always About Weather

We Are Here

January Thaw Preview

Getting Comfortable

The *Gown*

I Have No Room To Talk -- But...

Inaguration (Part Two)

Inaguration (Part One?)

The Gown